haywired.

i didnt see it coming, i got shot and my mind is haywired.its like a dream and i cant believe it is real even until now.im happy, its even happier than winning the first prize of the ToTo! sounds kua chang, but then it is so true. yes it made me smile whole day out BUT i had a feeling that perhaps, or maybe i am the one who misunderstood everything. thus, a little clarification is what i hope for.
i can be very open, understanding but towards some things, i can be very traditional. some actions to me can made me misunderstood, you are special to me but if you are not having the same feelings, please dont do that to me because it will only makes me fall deeper. the best thing for me is the truth, & i sincerely hope you speak it even if its not a good one, at least it is the real thing, truth & trust is very important to me even its for friendship. a little clarification is essential to prevent further having misunderstandings or complications thoughts. dont be afraid to hurt me and like me for who i am. no matter what that really is, or what you actually means, i still thank you for what you've done because it did eventually made me feel really very happy.

work made my days passed so fast! unknowingly, its been a week since i last updated my blog. days been really busy since i started work, although everyday i felt so tired and also feeling stress over work, but then, suprisingly, i still like going to work! haha sounds like abit crazy, yet its the fucking truth! hmm perhaps i shall elaborate more on this next time. although im busy with work, almost working everyday but i did try to arrange some time for my friends and also my girl. catch up with buddies and friends for supper and drinks after work once or twice a week is seriously enough for me to relax myself. of cause, to spend time with my baobei girl EnEn❤. i had promise myself, no matter how tired i still must spend some time with her, at least an hour a day. and very glad to say is although there are times i felt really shag out but everyday i still manage to achieve the time spent with her! =D my next goal is to bring her out on my OFF day. kinda hard to as recently im always too tired to go out. =( so thats why i hope in future i can do that! stress can make people learn and grow, it really do. although im always on a smiling face, but actually im really very very stress. stress until menstrual also late. =X hardly late for so long! but dont worry people, its impossible to be pregnancy. haha~ for work, there is alot of things on the list waiting for me to buck up, and the time is running short! for family, i need to be better in time management with my girl EnEn❤ . i need to balance my life now!

currently my life is all filled up by work.
my mind is all about

i need to do better, & better & better.................. x10000000 times!

because i am always not good enough.

there is no such thing call BEST in my dictionary

as i strongly agree that no matter how well you had achieved, there is always still space for improvement. although i do not know where my limits is [or best if i could be someone who have no limits, haha] but at the very least i had to tell myself to do it!

this post is to remind myself that :

this time round is a big jump for me, seriously it is. i can even foresee how stress its gonna be like even i had not yet started working! but since i had accepted the challenge, then i shall do my best! there is nothing more happier to had a job you prefer to be like, and get succeeded by becoming how you hope yourself can be. yes, i do sincerely hope one day, i can manage this job well, without doubts and fear over my capabilities and of cause to be more confident in achieving something i had never thought of getting as in the past i never had dream of i could be given the chance of getting this position. i must not back-up.

anyway, recently went out for some fun. my life is kinda more relax lately. met Roy on friday for dinner, and went Ratchada and Nana with Eileen, Rina and co. and yesterday, got to meet up old friends, Guo Wei and Ah Hao. went Ratchada again, and one round of billiard at hougang plaza. fun time~ =) maybe i need to relax myself before the upcoming stress! haha~ and today, spending my time with my girl is also one very happy thing. =D seriously, i wanna thank God for giving me all these good things that had happened on me recently. .